Monday, May 28, 2007

testing, hello, hello from dial-up hell...

ok.... i'm living in dial up hell ... getting a new adsl connection is just absurd, i got rejected by 2 companies due to some telstra connection thing, i am still on a waiting list for telstra dial up, i mean really, it's 2 weeks!! so i'm using an optus prepaid .
I just applied at TGP whatever, i just want a basic adsl connection!!!! god damn it.

Work has been busy... u know the usual crap.
I'm horny as hell but i just don't have time for bel-ami porn, i mean what language are they speaking>??????? and i get this weird naked email of some guy called 'david smith' sitting naked on a bed with brown velour blankets with an erect penis jutting up. On my birthday.

I have a stomach ulcer so i'm on these tablets which make me abit feel high.

I've been reading books, and watching dvds and shaving my balls with great care to leave no corners. Because i have the time.

Monday, May 21, 2007

Happy birthday to me!
33 years of craziness!!!

33 bloody years....

Saturday, May 19, 2007

I'm stressing!
This week has been busy, i think we made 10 thousand in one clinic, next week is even more busy if that is humanly possibly. However that means dumb and dumber are working at full capacity, since now they've been back-up only. I don't think one of them can cope with the stress, she has issues, alot of issues!! I swear if anyone is contemplating taking on apprentices look beyond the dollar signs and think twice. 17-18 YO's just don't get it, don't waste your time!!
Monday, lord i'll need a valium before work...normally it's chaos because the CEO is in clinic and me and dumber, which means i have to do everything!!
The only consolation is in 3 weeks (fingers crossed) i'll be moving into drummoyne to live, providing those house-people move out and in 4 weeks i'll be back to the other clinic so i can work in peace with adults!!

I guess you could say it's a learning experience and it certainly has tested my patience and challenged status quo, but it has also reaffirmed my belief that, weeds ought to be removed before they spread !!!!! God damn it.

Amy popped by on friday for lunch and we had warm sake, it was so yummy and we did ralph lauren and ferragamo and stumbled down the winding steps of the Queen victoria building.

I have a headache, horny and no lover to give me what lovers give, a bloody Big mac mcvalue meal deal!! jesus bloody christ!!!

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I took time out for myself today, i spent it hovering round luxe-in-the-city. Did the usual castlereigh st haunts using a 'winter coat' as an excuse to lurk about with my hair unravelled in black.
There was a fur lines winter coat at Versace that looked cute, reminicent of bundled children in eastern european countries and a silk-jacquared bag "you can scotch guard it" she assured me.
Climbed up and down Burberry which i must say has the best customer service amongst the brand-names. Do i really need a trench-coat?? no i don't but wouldn't it be glorious to have.
David jones and myers had nothing, maybe one or two denim alternates but, they're more coats than trenches.
Prada was so quiet, i did like a shirt there, black but slashed to reveal white stripes, kind of cool but that was summer and a moment has passed.
Pushing into Gucci cos those doors are so damn heavy, i waved to some sales-girl i've never met before and like dear friends we hugged and kissed hysterically to the horror of others.
In the end i threw on a olive coloured polo, it was a medium.
"oh i'll try it on anyway, i usually wear small" i quipped as i head into the dressing room. To my horror, i actually fit into a Gucci medium!!! I was shocked, mumbled 'this cant be right, no, no , no" then i pushed open the 7ft mirrored doors
"i'll just take this today"

I walked round in shrouds of confusion, 'how did i become a medium?, a Gucci-medium..... and decended into David jones foodcourt. Oh the delights, freshly baked cookies, truffles stacked from floor to lip-height, oyster bar, imported pasta with bits of wholegrain flour tossed in from some itallian grandmother at the foot of tuscanny, cheese! capers! Pate!
"it must be duck!" i demanded and this will be my lunch for tomorrow as i grappled some wild-seeded baguettes.

I love pate! i love love pate! i love love love pate!!

Anyway after all that hallaballoo i spent the rest of the evening dealing with a wireless modem.
I can't get a bloody signal so i have to walk round the house to find the right spot to recieve, it's the most troublsome receiving i've ever had.
The helpdesk-boy assured me to keep trying and one day it wil work!! one day it will work!!!

I've stopped smoking (again) the side affects have been terrible, panic attacks, getting worked up over nothing, getting violent ... client "stop slapping me! it hurts!!"
I'm getting these intermittent stomach pains but it's ok when i eat something, it's my body craving the warmth of inhaling nicotine, poor tummy...awww... so i've been eating alot which accounts for my upsizing, my fatness, my..obesity....!!!
So if i actually quit smoking forever i will be a neurotic crazy fat person but with clean lungs.

I can't fit into my Hussein chayalan pants!!!! fuck!!!

And single!!!

double fuck!!!

oh ... that's kind of hot.. ...

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Oh it's mothers day, did the usual, was lovely. I ate mango ice cream, hehehe

Anyway, we took gramps along too, poor old bugger doesn't know what's up or down yet he thinks he's some 21yr old stud.
He shows me photos of his recent 'girlfriends'

"this one is nice? or this one?"

i was bemused, all these 19 year old chinese girls with too much make up and wearing tight fitting jumpers, is that some sort of fully-clothed porn?
Anyway since grandma died 7 years ago he's never been the same, followed by quad-bypass surgery and radiation for cancer, it's amazing he survived this long yet still he wont use a bloody walking stick. Instead either my mum or myself gently hold his elbow, yes elbow, no other body part, when he walks.
He doesn't want to be seen as frail.
I think i blogged about the moment we had at the supermarket when his trackie-dacks fell off and he shuffled round the aisle with them round his ankles, "these pants are not much good, they too long " he commented as i tried desperately to lift his pants back up.
Or the time i helped him out of bed only to find him pantless with an erection and he goes, "still working, hehe"

Anyway today we had yum cha with him but he forgot to put his false teeth in so, er.. mum mashed most his food, then he wants this sticky-pork-fried thing, which he tries to chew in vain with no teeth only to open his mouth to spit it out but erm... it just got stuck on his gums and well, looked like he was trying to spit out a spiders web. I just grimaced, dad thought it was hilarious and said something most inappropriate and mum freaked out trying in vain to remove it all with her chopsticks.
Dad took himto the toilets to wipe his gums, mr smarty pants me.. gets some napkins and proceed to wipe the glutinous pastry thing off his gums only to find it sticking. Gramps ended up with bits of restaraunt napkin stuck all over his mouth as he forcably smiled infront of the bathroom mirror.
"ay yaaaa... "
my dad and i looked at each other and burst out laughing, gramps is there giggling away with tissue in his mouth.

I don't know, i need valium.

Walking round the shops with him is excruciatingly slow, however i see how happy he is and the fact that no one else takes him out... it's actually nice to spend time with him, i just wish he would stop taking his mini-photo album of chinese girls with him everywhere.
He bough 3 bags of caramel bonbons, 4 packets of raw sugar, 12 meat pies, 3 bags of frozen peas 2 packets of caramel koala "you can have one, you're a good boy !"
yes, he gave me one out of a packet of 12!!! hahahaha!!!
6 packets of toilet paper 9 rolls per packet, 6 jars of coffee, 2 whole chickens and 10 packets of scotch finger biscuits.
"that's alot of biscuits grandpa"
"shhhh.... don't tell anyone"
Anyway, we took him back and as we left he said to me.. " remember to do well in school and study!" and gave me $2
"buy some lollies any left over give to mum"

Friday, May 11, 2007

Hi Euphoria !


Me: Man
Date of birth: 21/may.
Current status: Single
Eye color: brown dark
Hair color: brown very dark
Right or left handed: Right
Zodiac: Gemini


My heritage: Asian
My fear: Flying
My weakness: solitude
My perfect pizza: anchovies! olives! basil! cheese.....


Your first thought waking up: where's my pants?
Tomorrow: work!
Your bedtime: horny horny horny
Most missed memory: sex, actually.


Pepsi or Coke: Coke diet
McD or Burger King: McD
Single or group dates: Single
Adidas or Nike: Nike
Lipton Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee!


Smoke: Yes, more and more each day
Curse: like a lady!


Drunk alcohol: please
Gone to the mall: Yes
Been on stage: Nope
Eaten sushi: yes


1 minute ago: playing with my precum
1 hour ago: stroking my cock
4 1/2 hours ago: having a shower
1 month ago: shopping at Gucci
1 year ago: Spent it at cafes and smoking cigars


I love: being with good friends
I feel: horny but disinterested
I hate: broken pencils
I hide: bits of broken lead
I miss: being in love
I need: a man who can fuck me senseless and cook me a decent meal.

I'm so, sooooo horny.
But i'm all alone so it's back to the cold showers.


Saturday, May 05, 2007

What a day, worked 8 hrs straight on a girls legs then stuffed myself senseless at macdonalds, bigmac and 'son of the mac' which is a mini version of the big mac. I nearly threw it all up but i'm not that precious.
Finally figured out the PDA ! haha.. i can get internet acess using mobile phone as modem and exported all my address and phone numbers etc from computer and entered all my appointments which will beep at me when it's time! all this without any fuckin instructions. Added bonus is i can carry all my photos with me so i can see the faces of my dear friends who are, distant and inbetween. Who would have thought i could be sentimental.

I bought books, iggy pop biography and fidel castro and religion and florence broadhurst biog. I've been reading myself into oblivion.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Does my arse have Wi-Fi ?
These are the modern day issues i have to deal with especially now i got a PDA which you can access the W.W.W wi-fi style . It seems being a busy single person these days even your peripherals come no-strings attached.
Technology imitating life.

Must i hover round a wi-fi hotspot to get access? running from one fast food chain to another looking oh-so important but really trying to tap and walk at the same time without slamming into a lightpole or overhanging tree branch.

I'm so over at-home micro-dermabrasion.

I've stopped eating lean cuisine, found space in my bag for sour-fruit lollies and scoffing hashbrowns from aportos before 11a.m because, the world isn't allowed to have hashbrowns after .

Eating fish for lunch now, with chips and i must say, i had the most wonderful pate and roast beef baguette, it was so good i can't describe the way my mouth was feeling. It was better than sex.

Mind you i've forgotten how it was like to have sex, it's been a long time, so much so i think i could be broken in again!
What a great gimmick to get back.

And i am just waiting for some feral occupants to move out of a share house and then i will move straight in. We've concluded all the finer details it's just a matter of time, i'm quite excited as it is only a few streets away from work and it's not some grannys place , that i will be house sitting next week. I shall take loads of photos of this creepy place and harrass the tortoise shell cat with pictures of limp-wristed attempts at style from Australian fashion week.
The shit will be fingered out onto racks at Myer very soon.

I'd rather masturbate whilst sniffing Petes re-tread moccasins..... text only feed ha!