Friday, October 06, 2006


"Do I have to change my name?
Will it get me far?
Should I lose some weight?
Am I gonna be a star?"

The man with the ugly shirt was difficult on thursday not that he was being, more so because i was feeling unwell. I haven't really struggled through 3 hrs of needle-poking for a while, once it was at the main clinic which is like home to me so there were plenty of paracetamol , asprin (weeee!) and ibuprofen to keep your mind off it. Had a chat with ms no-poop about her water-phobia. No wonder she doesn't poop.
Tried to chat to L. but you know, it's not easy to illuminate a room with a lamp that has no bulb. And N. waltzed in, confused the hell out of all of us and waltzed back out again.
Anyway i'm so glad that day is over and slept hideous amounts, read a book or two and felt extremely horny.
Strange when i feel at my worst i suddenly feel aroused, i hope it's not some subconscious-repressed-psychosexual disfunction darlings.
Well, more aroused than usual i guess, not that i don't feel it most of the time, not that i'm constantly. I remember one guy i dated who needed to "unload" 6 times a day. Eventhough i was happy to assist 6 times everyday got tedious and really became nothing more than mechanical.
I had to sit down eventually.
I'm contemplating a PDA just as the new Louis vuitton 2007 refills have arrived and those Burberry polos that fit so well as if they used my body as a template. The punk-rock studded belts coming over from London, soon will entwine my waistline.
I thought if i buy a PDA i would have to by a new bag to carry it and do i want carry a bag in summer?
Do i need anything really?
No, i have more than i need. and i can't even argue the notion of 'better' things as i have that too.
I'm pretty lucky for someone who once lived in an orphanage.
Sometimes i think what may have happened to all the others who were there waiting, wondering, wishing, dreaming.
Little faces in a starless sky.
It is at those moments of contemplation, fissues of vunerability that i learn the art of forgetting.

1 comment:

gav25 said...

i like the way you can capture so many different emotions in the one post.

learning the art of forgetting is something i dearly wish i could do. actually, making my mind shut the f**k up is something i wish i could do.

nice post dude.

Gav